Seeing what is Hidden

Three times in today’s Gospel reading Jesus says, “And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.”

It’s a warning to not be showy about faith, to not be a hypocrite. So often, if Christianity is the dominant culture, Christian faith can either be rote or performative. The outward motions and signs are there. But God sees the heart, the intentions, Jesus warns. He can tell the hypocrites from the pious. You may be checking off everything on the checklist of “good Christian,” but how and why are you doing it?

Don’t broadcast your charity or seek attention in your prayers or bemoan your fasting. The spiritual life is about the interior. It doesn’t matter if others see or know or understand. Sometimes the interior spiritual work takes you out of the noticeable, social routines. Will people think I’m praying less if they don’t see me praying as much? Wait, why does that matter?

As someone who has been struggling lately with that last part (feeling understood or struggling to find a similarly-minded community), it’s a reassuring reminder. Sometimes we get caught up in being seen—out of pride, out of envy, out of desire to fit in, out of social pressure to prove we’re doing what we’re supposed to. But God always sees.

God sees the hidden desires, the pains and sins and insecurities. He sees the hidden faith, the charity, the prayers, the sacrifices. He sees the intentions of your heart and the effort you put into following Him—what might appear simple to onlookers may have taken great courage, or what might appear like deep piety may honestly be a façade. He knows your weaknesses and failures and unsung victories. But He sees you, the full you. And rewards you accordingly.

That’s a challenge if you’re stuck in routine or merely going through prideful performative motions. It’s a challenge to step up, actually repent and mean the things you say and do. Give your heart over. Tough. Scary.

But it’s also a comfort if you’re trying. If you’re rooted in Christ and trying to follow Him but feeling like you’re flailing because you don’t get recognition or support. God sees your heart and hidden prayers. He knows what everyone else doesn’t, and their judgements of your faith are worthless. You follow Christ, not them. Your reward comes from God, not them.

It is nice when there is acknowledgement of our good deeds and support in our spiritual journey. As Christians, we should provide that to one another. But we are not guaranteed that; that’s life and circumstance. We are guaranteed that sincere faith is never discounted by God. So we better make sure our faith, however flailing, is sincere.